Entries by Ken B

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On Open Relationships and the Exclusivity Slider

“Infidelity” Comedienne Rosie Wilby tours a one-woman show titled, Is Monogamy Dead? As background research for the show, she conducted an anonymous online survey, “asking what behaviors would be considered infidelity. Seventy-three out of 100 respondents thought that falling in love with someone else with no sexual contact still counted, 31 percent selected staying up […]


The Self Empowering Monogamy Pledge

The part of monogamy that I was completely missing. This year many of my friends and clients are newly monogamous, after single life, dating, or being in an open relationship. My conversations with them have had me realize that I’ve been ignoring something important about monogamy. It’s as if I had only considered half of […]


The Compersion Matrix

Schadenfreude — taking pleasure from someone else’s misfortune Three Stooges; Wile E. Coyote Smiling when your ex gets dumped Empathy — the ability to feel and experience another person’s suffering Rushing to the hospital when your ex gets in a car accident If Moe actually blinds Curly, it’s not funny anymore Mudita / Compersion — taking pleasure […]

Why The Word “Jealousy” Is Useless – Jealousy Part I

[Contact Ken for a PDF of the entire 6-part series.] The word Jealousy is great for labeling an intense emotion that everyone recognizes. It’s pretty much useless in providing insight into what’s actually going on or what to do. Jealousy is an oversimplification of something that’s actually complex and nuanced. It’s an umbrella term for a […]

Rational Vs. Emotional – Jealousy Series Part II

[Contact me for a PDF of the entire 6-part series on jealousy, plus a few bonus articles.] Jealousy is a two-headed, green-eyed monster. It’s got an intellectual side and an emotional side. People often attempt to have rational conversations about it but let’s be clear: the emotional side runs the show. Jealousy absolutely, positively will not be reasoned […]

Too Much Of A Good Thing – Jealousy Series Part III

[Contact me for a PDF of the entire six-part series on jealousy, plus a few bonus articles.] Here’s something to consider. You did not set out to find a partner that no one is attracted to. You do not have a goal to be with someone who has absolutely no life whatsoever outside the relationship. […]