Entries by Ken B

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On Open Relationships and the Exclusivity Slider

“Infidelity” Comedienne Rosie Wilby tours a one-woman show titled, Is Monogamy Dead? As background research for the show, she conducted an anonymous online survey, “asking what behaviors would be considered infidelity. Seventy-three out of 100 respondents thought that falling in love with someone else with no sexual contact still counted, 31 percent selected staying up […]


The Self Empowering Monogamy Pledge

The part of monogamy that I was completely missing. This year many of my friends and clients are newly monogamous, after single life, dating, or being in an open relationship. My conversations with them have had me realize that I’ve been ignoring something important about monogamy. It’s as if I had only considered half of […]


The Compersion Matrix

Schadenfreude — taking pleasure from someone else’s misfortune Three Stooges; Wile E. Coyote Smiling when your ex gets dumped Empathy — the ability to feel and experience another person’s suffering Rushing to the hospital when your ex gets in a car accident If Moe actually blinds Curly, it’s not funny anymore Mudita / Compersion — taking pleasure […]

4 Flavors Of Cocky

Not all arrogance is the same. He got a big ego Such a huge ego I love his big ego It’s too much He walk like this ’cause he can back it up -Beyoncé Knowles, “Ego” I’m not naming any names. Instead I’m just going to leave this here in case you happen to know […]


Working Monogamy

Monogamy that works. Let’s survey the landscape: “Serial” monogamy. Affairs. Monogamish. Famously high divorce rates. Friends with benefits. Is true, lasting monogamy a fading institution? I’ve worked with individuals, happily married couples, people on the dating scene, marriages on the rocks, new relationships, poly-amores, and everything in between. And I’m going to speak a brutal truth. Monogamous relationships are harder […]

How Masculine Relates to Feminine

Out in the world, there’s this idea that the Masculine’s right role is to lead, and the Feminine’s is to follow. That’s not true but I can tell you how it comes to look that way. Yes, the Masculine thrives in the leadership role. But he’s an equally great follower. Truth is, the Masculine does well in […]